The Pull on Women by Ching Shun Wong

As soon as my eyes landed on the topic of this essay, I was fraught with uncertainty and  hesitation. If truth be told, I seem to have never experienced sexism and gender inequality  that bothered me. Being a student in a single-sex school, I see girls of my age dominating  the sports ground and triumphing in a host of competitions, taking up leadership positions  on campus. We have had our first female Chief Executive after 20 years since the  handover, ridding us of the stereotype that the female sex is the weaker sex. I feel  fortunate to be a girl living in Hong Kong in this day and age, and yet, I am asked to  probe into the difficulties that females in Hong Kong encounter today. I therefore  scrutinize my life and observations, and I uncovered that such a sense of satisfaction  could be the biggest challenge. Are we authentically content with what we have now, or  is there still an immense curb on women? 

Once a British colony, Hong Kong is deeply influenced by western culture which upholds  gender equality. Egalitarianism collided with traditional Chinese values, leading to two  paradoxes regarding women's status. 

The first paradox is the role of women. Gone are the days when men were responsible for  earning a living while women stay at home. With the rise of feminist consciousness,  women have the freedom to lead their own lives and pursue their career ambitions, thus  proving their worth and where they stand in society. However, many continued to find  themselves fettered by traditional Chinese perceptions of female roles that are virtually  irreversible. 

A striking illustration of this is my mother. Holding a master's degree, she went the extra  mile to advance her career before giving birth. While work encroached on her personal  life, my grandmother persuaded her to make a sacrifice for family responsibilities, which  was what she and every female had done in the bygone days. My mother was reluctant to  give in, just like any quintessential ambitious modern female, but it was almost arduous  to have it both ways. Hence, I grew up pampered by domestic helpers. Families in Hong  Kong often hire maids to cope with both work and childbearing. These underprivileged  women are bread-earners of their households, and yet ironically only domestic work  needs them. Ultimately, it is a woman's responsibility to do chores, forming an  imperishable glass ceiling and limiting their role. It is also deplorable to ascertain how  working mothers in Hong Kong had to resort to these disadvantaged women, yet both  struggled with the inherent roles as females. How is it not distressing? 

The second paradox is the source of happiness. Career ambitions that contribute to self actualization, often take a back seat to marriage or childbearing. Rather than having a  successful career, the Chinese community is accustomed to the belief that a good  marriage is paramount for a female. The phrase leftover ladies (sheng nu) was coined to  insult and ridicule those unmarried in their late twenties. The prominent role of being a  mother or wife seemingly defines a female's life and is ironically the fetter to women  finding their confidence. Those that remained working shoulder a dual burden that 

deprives them of rest and entertainment. The immense pressure on women to meet  responsibilities both at home and work even leads to many feeling exploited. 

Last year, I watched a Chinese variety show from 2019 named My Little One, which  attached a great emphasis on how women must marry to be happy. I saw every father  righteously affirm that his daughters getting married and having children was filial piety  and being responsible to the nation, which was astounding and did not align with  women's beliefs in this modern society. The show has not only engendered ferocious controversy but was also condemned as hypnotizing the public with outworn values. The  pull between two cultures on women puts an invisible restraint that struggles those who  are self-conscious and independent. It is of paramount importance that different vehicles  of culture, from books to the media, disseminate the proper message that upholds gender  equality. The media should keep abreast of modern values and equality of the sexes.  Furthermore, women should also be encouraged to fearlessly uphold their own desired  lifestyles and shape who they are. 

These equal rights were granted as gifts, and it takes endeavors to retain and defend them  until the pull on women eventually loosens.